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My wife doubts her beauty and I know why

My wife doubts her beauty. She frequently feels imperfect and often doesn’t feel she is beautiful. I know, it is ridiculous because she is absolutely gorgeous and I want her to believe it. My failure as a gentleman and a husband is a big part of the reason she has this doubt. A significant part of my role as a husband is to build Mariah up. I can admit, despite my shame, that I haven’t done a good job letting her know just how beautiful I think she is on the inside and on the outside.

Mariah and I have been together for over 13 years and have been married for 10.5 years. We have had great years together. It has been a rollercoaster ride, but all in all, it has been great. The truth is, I think she is more beautiful today than she was the day I met her or the day I married her. 

I could share many examples of Mariah’s beauty from my perspective. One easy example is that she has somehow continued to believe in me. A second example is how she loves and nurtures our loud, aggressive, persistent, and wide-open boys. A third example is her honesty – she has no problem holding me accountable. A fourth example is her free spirit (thank goodness because I need that). I could share many more examples, but I think you are beginning to understand her beauty.

As I mentioned earlier, Mariah’s doubt is partially my fault which causes her to question my sincerity. Thus, I will share Max’s (our 3 yesr old) perspective to be a little more persuasive. 

Max and I were looking at the wall in our entryway that has several pictures of our family. One is an engagement photo, several are wedding photos, and several are newborn pics of each boy. As we looked at the pictures, the one below (courtesy of Scott Schrecker) stood out to Max, our 3 year old. He asked me: ” why is mommy a princess?” Now, I have never had a conversation with him about the picture and have never mentioned to him that Mariah is a princess. In fact, I have no idea how he even knows what a princess is. His question confirmedthe beauty  he sees in Mariah.

As I raise our boys, I think about the mistakes I made and hope that I can teach them not to make the same mistakes. I want to teach them to communicate the beauty they see in their spouse. I want to teach them to communicate this everyday. I want to make sure that their spouses have no doubt. 

Mariah, you are beautiful to me and our boys. There is no reason to have any doubt. One of the best days of my life was the day you married me (see picture below courtesy of Scott Schrecker).

As Max and I stood looking at our puctures, I thought about how lucky I am and your perfect beauty.  He asked me a question that I am now asking you: “can we do this day again?”


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